It’s 6pm in the middle of January and I’m on a train from Stoke to Stone.
I’ve spent the day in Stoke. Teaching, mentoring and supporting a room full of entrepreneurship students.
I recorded a podcast. Had two coffees.
I told people they’re doing well. I keep doing that. Hype. Positivity. Belief. It’s free to give and makes all the difference.
There’s one young lad on the course that I just keep saying to “I believe in you mate” I mean it. Every time I say it he holds my gaze for a little bit longer each time. It goes in a bit deeper, I don't think it's landed yet.
I organised a couple of events for startup communities I’m building here.
Then I sat staring at my screen and out into the distance thinking if it’s making a difference and if it’s the work I really want to be doing.
Thinking, thinking, thinking.
Thinking, "why am I putting on events for business owners?"
"Why have I just spent 20 mins writing a passage in a book that nobody will ever read?"
Scrolling though my LinkedIn thinking "just pick one fucking thing to work on James."
Then I remembered the affiliate bookshop I can create on bookshop org. I’ve always wanted to sell books and this could be the way to do it. I’m reading Tao Te Ching - Lao Tzu and I added it to a list. Maybe I'll share it one day and have an online bookshop.
I put my feet on the floor eventually.
I remembered that January is named after the Roman God, Janus, the God of begginnings and transitions. That helped.
All the noise in my head. It’s just noise. It’s thought. Its fear. It’s made up. It’s nonsense.
What’s real is the event I just organised. The post I just shared. The story I just created. The people I helped today.
That’s real.
That’s real.
My alarm on my watch went off to remind me to leave to catch the train.
I slammed everything into my new Sandqvist rucksack. Said “Siri play pretty green eyes on Spotify” and left the building in a hurry.
The cold air hits my face. I look up. I’m in winter wonderland.
Crescent moon crisp in the black sky with sprinkling of stars. The floor frosted like a cake.
I am here. This is now. Doing all I can. One foot. One sentence. One brushstroke.
Trust me. Trust life. Trust the process. Know good things will come.
To you, wanderers, creators. It’s winter. We’re creating in the dark.
Time to get off the train.
Home.
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